The piece was published at the Believer magazine, Read it here: A Visit to Heizer’s City – Believer Magazine (thebeliever.net)
I visited Michael Heizer’s City for the first time in my dreams, twenty-seven years ago. I was twelve years old, living with my family in Kuwait, when I started to experience a recurring dream where I found myself wandering, naked, through an unfamiliar city, engulfed in shame, desperately seeking a wall to hide behind—but none existed. The city’s landscape was a blend of concrete ruins, sandy dunes, and winds that deepened my embarrassment with every gust. It was an abandoned city without visible inhabitants, yet I felt their eyes peeping at me. With no walls to shield its secrets, the city should have been an open, liberating space. Instead, I wandered, immersed in my shame, hopelessly seeking refuge.
I never shared this dream with anyone; it was etched into my memory as the ultimate image of embarrassment and shyness. Naked in a city without walls.
In my twenties, I learned through reading psychology books that such visions—constructed around shame and body vulnerability—are frequently associated with the adolescent phase of boys’ development. I felt satisfied with this explanation; however, my dream city continued to haunt me as an allegory. I kept looking for it in literature and art—until two years ago, when I stumbled upon a story in The New York Times about City, a monumental art project Michael Heizer has been working on for over fifty years. The report displayed the first-ever photos and videos of this enigmatic “sculpture,” which few had ever visited.
For me, it looked intimate and erotic, a solid, smooth egg floating over a milky ocean. I shivered as I looked at those images, and felt a terrifying sense of déjà vu. Seeing one’s dreams materialize into someone else’s life’s work is an unnerving realization.
I grew deeply fascinated with City, which was ……… READ THE Whole story
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